Legalize Pot? Why Not?

I had a long, depressing conversation today with the technology specialist and another teacher about student morality and motivation. The good part about it was I realized that I’m not the only one who feels like this crop of students (whether it be this generation, this age or this area) has no drive. So, on a lighter note, I present this argument:

Should this country legalize marijuana and tax the hell out of it? Or is legalizing drugs the next step in the declining morality of this country? Not that I’m obsessed with Jack Cafferty, but this was the topic of his commentary on CNN.com today.  His argument is based on the budget crisis in this country and the immense money-making opportunity of regulating pot.  While this may or may not be a good idea (I’ll get to my opinion in a second) he doesn’t hit on whether or not it’s likely.  Nate Silver, over at fivethirtyeight.com, addressed this topic a couple of weeks back.  His analysis is based on public opinion polls, which shows that, currently, about 40% of the pubic is in favor of legalization.  It would take quite a bit of idea-shifting to get a majority and push through that legislation.

My opinion?  People have demonized marijuana as part of the “Just Say No” war on drugs campaign from the 80′s.  While it’s a fair way to address the subject, I think it’s unfair to call it a gateway drug and still be alright with cigarettes and alcohol.  I think all three come down to family and personal values and should not be the domain of the government.  I did a quick Google search and found (this is, of course, approximate) that there are 12.1 million alcoholics, 9 million drug addicts in this country and about 21% of adults smoke.  I don’t hear anybody calling for prohibition or cigarette bans.  Marijuana has never been shown to be a cause of death.  You certainly can’t say that about alcohol.

Just because something is legal does not mean the public will all jump to participate.  Ever been to Vegas or Amsterdam?  Did you hire a prostitute?  Why not?  Because it wasn’t something you were interested in.  If you aren’t interested in smoking pot, you won’t.  Same reason you don’t smoke cigarettes.  I understand the label of “gateway drug.”  It’s the first drug that’s readily available when you’re growing up.  But that doesn’t mean people will do harder drugs.  I believe that drug addicts have bigger problems…it isn’t the availability that’s the problem.

Treat pot like alcohol.  Illegal until you’re 21.  Strict penalties for public consumption and DUI.  Then teach your children why moderation is important and that smoking is really bad for your health.  Tell them drugs are bad.  Have that conversation when they are young and continue to have it.  Other countries have lower or no drinking age.  Some have legal or decriminalized pot laws.  Do they have the drug and alcohol problems we have?  I guess I’m really asking there, I don’t know.  But I suspect not.

Jack Cafferty Writes What I Think

Cnn.com has a book excerpt from Jack Cafferty’s new book Now or Never.  It seems that I’m not the only one who feels this way about the youth of the nation.

“I don’t know the status of parenting in America. But I know a little about the status of education in America. Parents’ growing inability to impose manners and limits on their kids when the kids are in school is reflected in record dropout rates, as well as teen drug and alcohol abuse, teen sex, and unwed pregnancies. Maybe it’s parenting that’s on the decline, more than the schools.”

I know I’ve written this over and over again, but when parents refuse to discipline their children, how are teachers supposed to do this?  If a student gets in trouble, goes home to the parent to complain, and the parent invariably blames the teacher, what am I supposed to do?  This part also hit home:

“I remember as a kid I was expected to behave myself out in public or suffer the wrath of one very angry father. And of all the things that used to piss him off, those expectations didn’t seem unreasonable.”

My dad was the same way.  If I acted up, I’d get in trouble.  Now, instead of punishing children, parents shove a video game in their kid’s face to distract them.  It’s easier than yelling, right?

I don’t care to recount how many parents tell me they don’t know what to do.  How many tell me they can’t get their kid to do homework because that kid is too busy texting, watching TV or playing on the computer.  How many ask me what to do.  Am I a parent?  Sorry, but my answer is to end that cherished friendship with your son or daughter and take away their cell phone, their computer, their car.  If you really worry about what your child is doing, take control, don’t sit and whine about it.  Because, really, that’s what your children have learned to do.  If they don’t get their way, they sit and whine and say they deserve good grades because that’s what you told them.

Up above, the quote, “maybe it’s parenting that’s on the decline, more than the schools,” definitely rings true to me.  Of course you could say I’m biased, but I really think schools are better than they used to be.  Teachers are better trained and better prepared for class.  We have computers that can demonstrate what we cannot write on the board.  We can reach our students almost any time to help.  So much has advanced, yet our schools are doing worse?  I think, right now, we have better teachers with students that have 30 second attention spans.  I can repeat something 9 times, and five minutes later it’s as if I never opened my mouth.  I’m sorry, but that doesn’t mean teachers are bad.

Teacher Complaints

It’s really amazing how much teachers bitch about work.  I haven’t held a full-time job other than teaching, so I’m wondering if other people at other professions complain as much as teachers do to each other.  Every day at lunch, it’s one thing about this student, another story about another student, this one said this, that one said that.  Every other day an older teacher mentions, with the requisite pining in their voice, about the decline of students’ attention spans and the rise in the instant-gratification, all-about-me attitude.  Nobody ever talks about anything else.  I’m wondering if it’s just the teachers here or if it’s everybody everywhere.  Is anybody happy at their job???

Conversation with two students:

Girl 1: “I wanted to wear this skirt so I look good, but now I’m freezing.”

Me: “You’re a teenage girl.  You don’t have to dress like that to get guys.”

Girl 2: “Tell me about it.”

Bargaining Tool

I’m not sure how valid this is as an educational tool, but sometimes I have to bribe students to do their work.  I mean, their parents obviously refuse to give any incentive to do work, so I feel like I have to.  Example?  It can vary anywhere from promising to pass a student (regardless of percentage) as long as they do every….single….piece….of….work for the last few weeks of the quarter (and passing the quiz and the test) to offering to buy lunch for my student mentee if he brings up his English and Spanish grades.  You wouldn’t believe what a kid will do for Chipotle.  I asked him if he wanted to go to college and he said yes.  So I said that D’s and F’s won’t get him there.  Ok I know.  And I’ll buy you Chipotle if you manage it.  I’ll go talk to my teachers today!

Other bargains I’ve made…

• Giving a student a 1% bump one quarter for a penalty of 2% the next quarter (bad idea on the student’s part but I explained all that and he didn’t care).
• Doing manual labor for points.  (Usually it’s like 1 or 2 points out of hundreds at the end of the year.)  Want that extra point?  Put my books back in the storage room please.
• Guessing song lyrics for a point on a quiz.  Without using their iPhones.

So, people who read this blog, has anybody ever bargained with a teacher for a grade?  What’d you do?  What’d you receive?  Do you think it’s wrong?

Shout out to two of my friends: http://plightofthepumpernickel.blogspot.com/ and http://princessraininthepants.blogspot.com/

Sunday Confessional

I think the first mistake I made this morning was clicking on the online newspaper poll: Should teachers get paid based on performance in the classroom?  My second mistake was reading the comments underneath the results.  I don’t want to write about my opinions on teacher pay, as I’ve done that already.  But right now, I feel as angry as I’m going to feel about being a teacher.  What it boils down to is that a majority of people have no clue what it’s like to be a teacher.  I read comments like, “of course teachers pay should be tied to performance, just like any other job,” and “teachers are letting their students down and if they teach to the test they should be fired.”  Again, no idea what it’s like to be in charge of teaching 150 kids.

First, every job has incompetent employees.  Why is teaching any different?  Especially since teachers don’t get paid as much as other professions.  What’s drawing the cream of the crop to teaching?  Yeah, yeah, it’s a “calling”.  So what?  People having callings in all sorts of professions.  There are incompetent and lazy doctors, lawyers, policemen, professors, baseball players, etc.  Teaching is no different.  People get into teaching for many reasons, but nobody gets into teaching because they can make a decent living.  Intelligent people are drawn to higher paying jobs because they are qualified for them.  If teacher pay was increased, more people would want to teach and some of them would be great teachers.  Some would be ok teachers.  The total loser teachers would go away because now there’d be replacements.  It’s not rocket science, it’s basic economics.  You wouldn’t have situations where administrations hire the first person through the door because they need somebody to throw up in front of a class.

Teacher’s shouldn’t teach to the test?  Really, they have no choice.  Yeah, I wish standardized testing would go away.  It’s absolutely evil and is killing US education.  Why?  Because administrations would rather have everybody pass the test at a low level than develop bright young minds with the bottom kids not passing.  A teacher will be left alone if everybody barely passes, but will have issues if 90% of the class passes with extremely high scores and the other 10% fail.  Think about your job for a second.  If the boss was going to be happy with you getting through a ton of work with mediocre results but be down your throat if you do mostly excellent work, what would you do?  You’d go the route so that your boss leaves you alone and you get to do your work.

People have no idea what it’s like to face a class full of students who don’t listen.  Where you have to repeat instructions 10 times and then repeat them again.  Where students stare at their cell phones and text each other when you write notes on the board.  Where they say they are paying attention because they’ve copied down what you wrote but have no idea what it means, and don’t see anything wrong with that.  Students that do as little as possible to pass by.  A situation where your only ammo against them is a bad grade, but you’ll get in trouble if too many of them do poorly (by “do poorly” I mean get D’s and F’s).  A school or classroom where we’re encouraged to just pass them because it’s easier.  An administration that only pays attention to you if you are in trouble, otherwise you never even see them.  A job where good students do well because they are smart but bad students do poorly because the teacher is bad.  A job in which parents yell at you because their kids don’t pay attention or do their homework and they want to know why I am not a better teacher.

I think the biggest change in education is the attitude of parents and not much else.  If anything, most teachers are much better than they used to be.  Better educated, better trained, more at their disposal.  Except, in the past, parents trusted teachers.  If a student was failing, the student was held accountable.  Why aren’t they working harder?  Going for extra help?  Paying more attention?  Sorry, teacher, my child will work harder or else they will be grounded.  And they will fail.  And that will be a good lesson for them.  Now?  If a student is failing, the teacher is held accountable.  I take their phone away because they are using it in class and the parent gives it right back.  Parents tell me, “I can’t make my child do work.”  “They have too much on their plate.  Can you modify assignments for them to make it easier?  It isn’t fair that they don’t get enough sleep…of course they can’t pay attention!”

How am I supposed to help people like that?

Music:  Accoustic version of “Zombie” by The Cranberries

He Really Loves Corn, No…Porn

Student #1:  “This is a little off topic.  Ok, a lot.  I heard on the radio that porn is as addicting as meth or heroin.  That’s ridiculous.  It can’t be true.”

Me: “Well then maybe you should try porn and stop using heroin.”

Student #1: “Yeah,  I am addicted to all three.  There’s no way porn is as addicting as drugs.”

Student #2: “Why would you be addicted to corn?”

Cheating

There are many ways to cheat on tests.  Some time-tested ways:  sheet of paper under the desk, looking at somebody else’s paper, even the old Wonder Years baseball cap signal trick.  Then there are new ways, like text messaging answers to friends.  All of this goes on, and I’m appalled by how much cheating takes place.  No matter what I do, I can’t sit by everybody the whole test and I don’t have the room to separate them.  I can make different test versions, but I’ve found they’re smart enough to figure that out.  Imagine that…they aren’t smart enough to study for a test or to listen to me or work out a problem, but they all can figure out which version of the test they have and how it’s different from the kid sitting next to them.  Or they text their friend while I’m helping somebody.

I asked a student today who cheated and who actually did the work.  He said nobody was cheating…the girls was “just looking at my paper.”  I told him that’s cheating.  He gave me a blank stare.  Apparently nobody ever explained to a 17 year old that using somebody else’s test was cheating.  Wonderful.

Other things 17 year olds don’t know:

• Rooms are small and the teacher can hear everything that’s going on.
• If I suspect a student is cheating, they lose all benefit of the doubt on partial credit.
• I can tell when they’re texting.
• I don’t care if they copy homework or labs from somebody.  They think they’re getting away with something meaningful, but ultimately they’ll screw up the test because they don’t know the material.
• The concept of TMI.
• The more they pay attention, the faster the period will go, the better they’ll understand the material and the better they’ll do on tests.
• All they have to do is turn in they’re work and they’ll pass.

Ah…Test Day

Is it my fault that students don’t study?

“Mr. _____, I can’t take this test. You don’t teach good.”
“Billy*, It’s well. I don’t teach well.”
“See, if you taught me I would’ve known that.”

Teacher Crimes

Among some bad things teachers can do, one is to have a relationship with a student.  Last night a friend asked me if I would ever do that and my response was a quick no thanks.  I’m perfectly happy with people my age and I like my job thankyouverymuch.  Next question, do I think it happens more than what’s reported on the news?  Yeah, sadly I think it does, although I don’t have any reason or proof to back up such a claim.  It’s just a hunch.

And then I get an e-mail about this news story out of Maryland.  Two teachers are under investigation for using duct tape to shut students’ mouths when they won’t be quiet.  My teacher friend sent it over with the subject line: Great Idea! and the message “why didn’t I think of this?”  I’ve definitely done this, but not with duct tape.  It would’ve been more effective that way.  Of course, these aren’t 3rd graders, and I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t know that the kid would laugh about it, but still.  We can’t hit them, we can’t discipline them, so we have to make them respect us.  What the hell is that?!  Hitting is much easier*.

(*Big tongue-in-cheek on this one)

For no apparent reason here are what my 5 senses are dealing with right now:

Sight: Students trying to cheat on a test.

Smell: Fresh brewed coffee

Taste: Weird aftertaste of yogurt.  Although it was one of those raspberry cheesecake yogurts with 110 calories.

Touch: Keyboard

Sound: Silence, because they are taking a test and concentrating really hard on the test next to theirs.

Teacher Twitter

Sitting here with one student.

Wow, that was so exciting.  I hope you all appreciate my short status message.  I mention this after Monday night’s Daily Show segment about Senators and Congressmen using Twitter during Obama’s speech the other night.  Instead of paying attention to the address, they were busy putting up stupid messages on Twitter.

I have to confess that, although I’m not even close to a technophobe, I am very much against having new technology just because it’s new.  Technology for technologies sake….which happens to the be the motto of my school.  It’s new!  Let’s buy it and tell everyone we have it!  And then the teachers don’t use whatever-it-is because it doesn’t have practical use in a classroom.  More on this later.

Ok, not a technophobe.  But I resisted a cell phone in 2001 because, really, who was I calling?  But I embraced flat screen TVs.  And cable internet connections.  But not phones with QWERTY keyboards.  Or cameras really.  I have a digital camera to take pictures.  Myspace?  No.  Facebook?  Yes, but I’m not on it 24-7.  And I don’t update my status ever.  iTouch?  I can’t think of any recent time where I wished I had music and internet access at the same time and didn’t actually have it.

The point being, why do we need to write down little bits of thought for the world to see?  And who subscribes to these things?  I wouldn’t even care to subscribe to my girlfriend’s twitter (if she had one).  But, old people in Congress have decided that the YOUNG PEOPLE LIKE TWITTER so we will use it because it’s cool and then they’ll vote for me because I use Twitter and they use Twitter and we relate so vote for me because we think the same and I represent you and vote for me please don’t forget to vote.

But these Congressmen that don’t pay attention to what they’re supposed to…they have assistants to tell them what it was all about.  They have staff that writes speeches for them and basically does all the dirty work.  My students, on the other hand, do not have these things.  But they are all on their phones all day long.  They pay attention to very little.  It’s amazing, really.  It’s not even an attention span issue.  At any moment, probably half my students are using their cell phones.  It’s not allowed. So I’ll ask the one or two that I catch to put it away.  If I see it again, I take it.  Fair enough, so I have the time to warn a couple kids about using their phones.  Maybe take one.  But if I decided to take up that fight, I’d never get to teaching.  They don’t even care about losing their phones.  Their parents come after school to pick it up and give it right back to them.  No repercussions.  So they don’t pay attention.  And they don’t listen to me.  And they do poorly on quizzes and tests and claim that I “never went over this” (italics indicate whiny voices) even though I gave an example problem RIGHT BEFORE THE STUPID TEST THAT WAS EXACTLY LIKE THAT PROBLEM.  So, yeah, they don’t pay attention.  And they are vindicated because they aren’t the only ones.  Hey, if a Senator doesn’t listen to the President, why should I listen to you?

My other favorite excuse, and this is true, is this: “But I was texting another teacher!” or “But I was texting the assistant principal, he told me to!”  I swear, my only response to this is WTF.  I don’t care.  I don’t care who told you to text them, if it’s in my class it’s not allowed.  But how am I supposed to reinforce this idea if they are texting other teachers or part of the administration???  Too ridiculous.

Lastly, having to do with technology for technologies sake.  Apparently Apple is doing a promotion where certain schools will be picked to receive iTouches for every student.  Our assistant principal thinks this is a great idea.  Why?  Because it’s another piece of electronics that he can tell everybody we have.  What in the world would every student need an iTouch for, besides to have a principal approved reason not to pay attention to the teacher.  But, of course, it’s our fault if the kid fails a test.  Because we’re not doing our job.  Our ever-increasingly impossible job.